Funny Sayings by Jason Love 09-61

I wanted to try water polo, but it seemed so cruel to the horses.

Musclewomen confuse my pheremones.

When you get mad, take ten deep breaths. If you're still mad, it's okay to hurt someone.

Probability is 100% chance.

It's always interesting to see what receipts are in your pocket the morning after margaritas.

By July 4th, California has already celebrated independence. We call it Cinco de Mayo.

At the airport, there should be a place to have sex -- you know, for when flights are delayed.

People are bad for the environment.

Avocados cost so much, I eat the skin too.

Judging by our political decisions, hindsight is 50-50.

My church isn't committed to a denomination. Tens, twenties, fifties -- it all works.