Funny Sayings 08-12

I've known four different Lukes, and not one has been warm.

Sometimes opportunity knocks when you're too damn tired to get up.

The squeaky wheel also gets replaced.

We need to work I.Q. into a woman's measurements.

You know the basketball game is decided when the white guys come in.

The designated driver is the one with the DUI.

The only thing worse than being unemployed is having a job.

Real friends are the ones who survive transitions between address books.