Funny Sayings 07-103

Be happy, if only to spite your parents.

Some people have so much money, they're retarded.

I could have been a doctor, but there were too many good shows on TV.

When you dial 9 to call out of your home, there's a chance you may be working too much.

It's okay to have nothing to say ... unless you're talking.

The best part about books is that there are no commercials.

Make sure you're not at the airport when your ship comes in.

Hypochondriacs are sick.

The problem with bald guys is that you don't know where their face ends.